World History 101

I read this on the Internet and found it very amusing , well worth saving and thought others may enjoy it also.



World History 101 Condensed
Posted by Larry Bradley at 8/19/2008 6:41 PM and is filed under Political Humor

A friend sent me this in an email.


Subject: World History 101 condensed..


For those of you who slept through World History 101 here is a condensed version.


Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter.


The two most important events in all of history were:


1. The invention of beer, and

2. The invention of the wheel.


The wheel was invented to get man to the beer, and the beer to the man.


These facts formed the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the
splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:


1. Liberals

2. Conservatives.


Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.


Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to BBQ at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservative movement.


Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly BBQ's and doing the sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal movement.


Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. The rest became known as girlie-men.


Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy and group hugs, the evolution of the Hollywood actor, and the concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide all the meat and beer that conservatives provided.


Over the years, Conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass.


Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.


Another interesting evolutionary side note: most liberal women have higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals.


Conservatives drink domestic beer. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo cowboys, miners, engineers, firemen, lumberjacks, construction workers, medical doctors, police officers, corporate executives, athletes, golfers, and generally anyone who works productively.


Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.


Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the wild west was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing.


Here ends today's lesson in world history.

Things to consider during this election

Things to consider during this election period.

I have been told and have heard on the radio and read in the newspapers that we should bring our troops home, abandon their positions, after all what business does the United States have sticking its nose everywhere in the world, stay out of it, it’s not our business. Or is it? Is the shadow of a specter looming on the horizon?

There are threats everywhere, un-thought of evil encroaching closer and closer, the realization of car bombs, suicide killings, kidnappings and beheadings about to splash over our daily front pages. We have troops tied up in Iraq and Afghanistan, we can’t just turn tail and run like a cowardly lion. When we bring our men and women home it must be in victory. We owe that to those who have served, many, more then one tour. We owe it to those who have paid the ultimate price. Nothing short of victory will bring honor to them.

We have no choice but to be pro-active in world events, our national security is at stake. Look at what’s happening with Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, he is increasing his nuclear capacity, thumbing his nose at America, he proclaims disbelief of the holocaust and vows to wipe Israel of the face of the earth through his own holocaust, then he wants to annihilate us.

Israel, like the rest, is waiting to see the results of our Presidential election, God help us, we have the last choice picks to choose from. On one hand we have a long term senator who never saw a democrat initiative he didn’t shoulder up to, but will give us, we hope, good conservative judges like Antonin Scalia and Clarence Thomas, and he is a senator familiar with war. The other, a novice, a short term senator, a community organizer, a good speaker as long as there is a teleprompter, not a single thing he can point to as a qualifier, he has zero experience, zero commonsense, zero good judgment, and zero interaction with world leaders who would eat his lunch 24/7 at our expense, whose mantra is change, God help us. Israel will not just lie down and be murdered, Israel will fight tooth and nail especially if Benjamin Netanyahu becomes Prime Minister, he is no milk toast weakling like Ehud Olmert.

Then there is Al-Qaeda and Osama Bin Laden; the Mujahedin; the Kurds; Hamas; Hezbollah and not to be forgotten, that stumpy, dog eating, pot bellied dictator in North Korea, Kim Jong-il.

Vladimir Putin is busy checking America’s resolve, will we stand up or not, that’s the big question for him, he is also watching to see who becomes our next President; I wonder who he is pushing for? He is also pursuing a goal of setting up missiles in Cuba; does anyone remember the Cuban missile crisis? Of course that happened back when Democrats were a different breed then they are now.

Then, also not to be forgotten, on the world stage is China’s intention to take back Taiwan.

Within our own boarders is the constant problem of illegal immigration, it is driving us into the poor house and the diseases being brought into our country were, up to recently, conquered. Thanks to our cullender like boarders our children are being infected, thanks to NAFTA our vegetables now have to be irradiated, at one time we had the safest, cleanest, best produce in the world, look at what we have now.

The North American Union; a hoax? I wish it was. The Security and Prosperity Partnership of North America. The belief that a North American Union is currently being planned and implemented in secret has become widespread, so much so that the NAU was a topic of debate during the 2008 American presidential campaigns and the subject of various U.S. Congressional resolutions designed to thwart its implementation.

NAFTA superhighway

Interstate 29 and Interstate 35.

The Trans-Texas Corridor was first proposed by Texas Governor Rick Perry in 2002. It consists of a 1,200 foot (366 m) wide highway that also carries utilities such as electricity, petroleum and water as well as railway track and fiber-optic cables. In July 2007, U.S. Representative and candidate for the Republican nomination in the 2008 presidential election Duncan Hunter successfully offered an amendment to House Resolution 3074, the FY2008 Transportation Appropriations Act, prohibiting the use of federal funds for U.S. Department of Transportation participation in the activities of the Security and Prosperity Partnership of North America (SPP). Hunter stated that: "Unfortunately, very little is known about the NAFTA Super Highway. This amendment will provide Congress the opportunity to exercise oversight of the highway, which remains a subject of question and uncertainty, and ensure that our safety and security will not be compromised in order to promote the business interests of our neighbors. "Fellow Republican Congressman and presidential candidate Ron Paul brought the issue to mainstream prominence during the December 2007 CNN-YouTube GOP debate, where he rejected the concept and also called it "the NAFTA Superhighway" and, like Hunter, framed it within "the ultimate goal" of creating a North American Union.

The Ministry of Transportation for the province of Alberta displays a diagram on their website that labels I-29 and I-35 as the "NAFTA Superhighway".

In September 2006, U.S. Representative Virgil Goode proposed with six co-sponsors non-binding House Concurrent Resolution 487, which specifically outlined opposition to a North American Union or a NAFTA Superhighway as a threat to U.S. sovereignty. The bill never left committee. The same resolution was reintroduced by Goode in January 2007 for the 110th Congress as House Concurrent Resolution 40, this time with forty-three cosponsors, including unsuccessful 2008 Republican presidential candidates Duncan Hunter, Ron Paul and Tom Tancredo, who have all expressed opposition to a North American Union during their campaigns.

So there you have it, is this “N. A. U./ S. P. P.” a hoax, just so much smoke to be ignored? There are many who think otherwise. Should our soldiers all be brought back to the confines of our boarders? Maybe some, we could use them to aid the Boarder Patrol.

You decide.

I Have A Plan To Destroy America

I read this awhile back and was so struck by it that I had to save it. I have no information on the exact date when this was written.

A Frightening Analysis

I Have A Plan To Destroy America

Collected on the Internet 2005

We all know Dick Lamm as the former Governor of Colorado. In that context his thoughts are particularly poignant. Last week there was an immigration-overpopulation conference in Washington, DC, filled to capacity by many of American's finest minds and leaders. A brilliant college professor named Victor Hansen Davis talked about his latest book,"Mexifornia," explaining how immigration - both legal and illegal was destroying the entire state of California. He said it would march across the country until it destroyed all vestiges of The American Dream.

Moments later, former Colorado Governor Richard D. Lamm stood up and gave a stunning speech on how to destroy America. The audience sat spellbound as he described eight methods for the destruction of the United States. He said, "If you believe that America is too smug, too self-satisfied, too rich, then let's destroy America. It is not that hard to do. No nation in history has survived the ravages of time. Arnold Toynbee observed that all great civilizations rise and fall and that 'An autopsy of history would show that all great nations commit suicide."

1. "Here is how they do it," Lamm said: "Turn America into a bilingual or multi-lingual and bicultural country. History shows that no nation can survive the tension, conflict, and antagonism of two or more competing languages and cultures. It is a blessing for an individual to bebilingual; however, it is a curse for a society to be bilingual.

"The historical scholar Seymour Lipset put it this way: 'The histories of bilingual and bi-cultural societies that do not assimilate are histories of turmoil, tension, and tragedy.' Canada, Belgium, Malaysia, Lebanon all face crises of national existence in which minorities press for autonomy, if not independence. Pakistan and Cyprus have divided. Nigeria suppressed an ethnic rebellion. France faces difficulties with Basques, Bretons, and Corsicans."

2. Lamm went on: "Invent 'multiculturalism' and encourage immigrants to maintain their culture. I would make it an article of belief that all cultures are equal. That there are no cultural differences. I would make it an article of faith that the Black and Hispanic dropout rates are due to prejudice and discrimination by the majority. Every other explanation is out of bounds.

3. "We could make the United States an 'Hispanic Quebec' without much effort. The key is to celebrate diversity rather than unity. As Benjamin Schwarz said in the Atlantic Monthly recently: 'The apparent success ofour own multiethnic and multicultural experiment might have been achieved not by tolerance but by hegemony. Without the dominance that once dictated ethnocentrically and what it meant to be an American, we are left with only tolerance and pluralism to hold us together."

4. Lamm said, "I would encourage all immigrants to keep their own language and culture. I would replace the melting pot metaphor with the salad bowl metaphor. It is important to ensure that we have various cultural subgroups living in America reinforcing their differences rather than as Americans, emphasizing their similarities."

5. "Fourth, I would make our fastest growing demographic group the least educated. I would add a second underclass, unassimilated, undereducated, and antagonistic to our population. I would have this second underclass have a 50% dropout rate from high school."

6. "My fifth point for destroying America would be to get big foundations and business to give these efforts lots of money. I would invest in ethnic identity, and I would establish the cult of 'Victimology.' I would get all minorities to think their lack of success was the fault of the majority. I would start a grievance industry blaming all minority failure on the majority population."

7. "My sixth plan for America's downfall would include dual citizenship and promote divided loyalties. I would celebrate diversity over unity. I would stress differences rather than similarities. Diverse people worldwide are mostly engaged in hating each other - that is, when they are not killing each other."

"A diverse, peaceful, or stable society is against most historical precedent. People undervalue the unity it takes to keep a nation together. Look at the ancient Greeks. The Greeks believed that they belonged to the same race; they possessed a common language and literature; and they worshipped the same gods. All Greece took part in the Olympic games. A common enemy, Persia, threatened their liberty. Yet all these bonds were not strong enough to overcome two factors: local patriotism and geographical conditions that nurtured political divisions. Greece fell. "E. Pluribus Unum" -- From many, one. In that historical reality, if we put the emphasis on the 'pluribus' instead of the 'unum,' we can balkanize America as surely as Kosovo."

8. "Next to last, I would place all subjects off limits ~ make it taboo to talk about anything against the cult of 'diversity.' I would find a word similar to 'heretic' in the 16th century - that stopped discussion and paralyzed thinking. Words like 'racist' or 'xenophobe' halt discussion and debate."

"Having made America a bilingual/bicultural country, having established multi-culturist, having the large foundations fund the doctrine of'VICTIMOLOGY,' I would next make it impossible to enforce our immigration laws. I would develop a mantra: That because immigration has been good for America, it must always be good. I would make every individual immigrant symmetric and ignore the cumulative impact of millions of them."

9. In the last minute of his speech, Governor Lamm wiped his brow. Profound silence followed. Finally he said, "Lastly, I would censor Victor Hanson Davis's book Mexifornia. His book is dangerous. It exposes the plan to destroy America. If you feel America deserves to bedestroyed, don't read that book."

There was no applause. A chilling fear quietly rose like an ominous cloud above every attendee at the conference. Every American in that room knew that everything Lamm enumerated was proceeding methodically, quietly, darkly, yet pervasively across the United States today. Every discussionis being suppressed. Over 100 languages are ripping the foundation of our educational system and national cohesiveness. Barbaric cultures that practice female genital mutilation are growing as we celebrate'diversity.'

American jobs are vanishing into the Third World as corporations create a Third World in America - take note of California and other states - todate, ten million illegal aliens and growing fast. It is reminiscent of George Orwell's book "1984." In that story, three slogans are engraved inthe Ministry of Truth building: "War is peace," "Freedom is slavery," and"Ignorance is strength."

Governor Lamm, walked back to his seat. It dawned on everyone at the conference that our nation and the future of this great democracy is deeply in trouble and worsening fast. If we don't get this immigration monster stopped within three years, it will rage like a California wildfire and destroy everything in its path, especially The AmericanDream.

Richard Lamm was a Democrat who served for twelve years, from 1975 to 1987.